A TRIBUTE

Clad in a simple white sari
Oh! that eloquent ever smiling nari
She is gone ,
gone to the abode of heaven to be reborn

May we moan not,
for she has finally attained freedom from the shackles of time and space
May we cry not,
for it may slow down her majestic ship`s pace.
May we worry not,
for the sea would be calm and clear,

And there would be no foam of doubt and fear.
May we not be sad and pensive,
even though the tickets may be very expensive,


For she is the one who fully deserved

a seat beside him carefully preserved.

Amma, You may be very far away,
but You will always be there in our hearts to stay.
You loved and cared for all patiently responding to everyone’s call.

How can we forget that ever present smile,
which would encourage us to go that extra mile.
How can we forget those lips and eyes,
full of love care and advice.
How can we forget the touch of those soft hands,
which could cure an ill like the touch of a magical wand.

Forget let us not to keep her dreams alive
to work hand in hand in every step of life.
Your blessings will always show us the way
May You receive bliss and solitude in every possible way.

3 more products from Steve Jobs

Steve Jobs, as we all know passed away a couple of days back. Tributes and encomiums have been pouring in from all quarters about this visionary entrepreneur. From disruptive products like iMac, iPod, iTunes, iPhone, iPad to Pixar Studio’s Toy Story, Wall-E and more, he reinvented, challenged and shaped the perception and outlook of a generation. ‘Connecting the dots backwards’, from being a college drop-out to being a wanderer searching for spiritual enlightenment in India in the 1970’s to making the most astonishing comebacks in business history, he had seen, experienced and lived through it all. As they say, the best and most beautiful things are for free, here are three more products as a part of Steve’s Legacy:
iLove – Steve said he was fortunate to find what he loved to do very early in his life. For that he had explored a lot, took chances and made sacrifices. ‘Stay Hungry, Stay Foolish. Don’t settle, Keep Looking’. Perhaps if we looked deep, and believed that our heart knew what we truly wanted to become, then we would one day most certainly find our iLove. Infact, education in its truest sense is all about knowing oneself better. Steve without completing his own was a perfect embodiment of its spirit.
iFaith – I have come across many people who say they’d love to do this, they’d love to do that. Meaning that they have an idea of what they’d love to do. So, what is it that keeps them from following what they love? In a country like ours where mediocrity, stereotype and judging people through ones myopic viewpoints rule supreme, it becomes extremely important to equip oneself with the next product – iFaith. “Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice.”
iVision – Steve was a leader, an architect, one who inspired by combining design, technology and focus. What make a great company great is the value that it strives to create, the scale of its impact – the vision. The notion of transformation, a vision and change is a romantic, idealistic one but to actually be able to do it requires resilience; strive for perfection and hard work. I believe that if people did something sincerely for a sustained period of time, then sooner or later they would possess or develop the required talent and skills to accomplish something. It is therefore more important to get an iVision - to know how exactly how one wants to ‘put a dent in the universe’.
In today’s world of social networking, with 1000+ acquaintances/friends there’s the freedom to share everything that is there on one’s mind. But then there are few people, who we truly admire and worship, and look up to in times of distress and confusion to seek clarity and strength. Watching Steve’s Stanford commencement video has always helped me find answers, quell inner storms and urged me to keep looking, keep fighting and keep the fire alive.
If there was one question that I could ask Steve - what exactly did ‘i’ stand for him? Perhaps it could have been innovation, inspiration, intelligence, intuitive or ideal.
I’d go with iMMORTAL.

11 days to 11 minutes

to alicia@lastlaugh.com from bateman@mockingbird.com; mailed on June 19, 2011:

Dear Alicia,

Getting married on June 31. Thought I should let you know instead of you knowing about it from others. Sorry for how things turned up between us.

Bateman.

to bateman@mockingbird.com from alicia@lastlaugh.com;mailed on June 29, 2011:

FYI - www.highdates.com/classifieds

"Twenty nine years old successful, mature, vivacious, rapacious woman in possession of fine legs, great arse and a knocking pair of knockers, seeks lover.Clandestine sex, sparkling conversation, no emotional attachment, one night stand"

If interested mail to: adventure@carnal.com with the necessary details.

89 responses. Click here to read them all

Home team: 10, Away: 0

June 30, 2011: Home team: 11, Away: 1

(Alicia & Bateman had dated for sometime before breaking up on the grounds that Bateman was under pressure to marry some other girl. Alicia though realized that Bateman never took her for his type and that this was just an excuse to hide the real reason - that she was too simple, timid and uncomplicated for his taste.)

Blurt you Flirt

The other day I was surprised at the remark, ‘Why were you flirting with the girl’ by my mom who happened to eavesdrop (by mistake) on my conversation. I had never imagined myself as someone who would be actively engaged in flirting. I kind of associated flirting with something shallow & meaningless. A couple of days back, I was forced to take this friend to a hospital out of concern that he would not last to see his D-day (to be cursed with 3 days of bliss and a lifetime of suffering). So, there I was at a place designed strategically (the pale color of the walls, sheets, smell of Dettol) to make the healthy feel nauseated and the sick feel like dying. And then out of nowhere, came this cute nurse. Like a deer in a desert, she was hopping from one patient to the other, curing them with her 100 watt smile. As usual, I wound around myself the chains of restraint resulting in my friend being the sole beneficiary of her tender care and attention.

The Metamorphosis: Male-female interactions in our society are broadly categorized under two heads: Within the Family - relatives or Non Family - friends. Now when it comes to the latter, their idea courtesy Bollywood – is limited to invariably nothing but a process that would lead to an exchange of bodily fluids. Some of my favorites, like Mr & Mrs Iyer, Raincoat, Before Sunrise, Black, Black Swan explored beautifully the platonic aspects and more, thereby highlighting the complexities, subtleties and emotions involved. Movies are instrumental in creating a profound impression on the junta, as most do not have access to other mediums like books, or forums to help build a perception about relationships. This leads to a tendency where most of the times the approach to a relationship from the beginning itself is flawed – the one of a predetermined need, a foregone judgment. This reconnaissance like approach leads to a serious lack of diversity, candor and flavor in relationships.

Flirting Demystified: I read this tweet of Riya Sen (one of those rare occasions when her thoughts caught my attention) – ‘The amount of charm of the charmer is directly proportional to the capacity of being charmed of the charmee’. Flirting is very much like a snake charmer trying to charm a snake. There's harmony and sync between the two when the charmer is skilled as well as the snake is willing to follow and dance to the tunes of the charmer.

Flirting happens only “when two people with a minimum level of intellect and frequency, tacitly agree to have a good time in a non-exclusive, playful manner with certain boundaries”. So, there’s a difference between hitting on someone and flirting as the former is a one-way street while flirting has to be mutually agreeable for both parties.

The duration of the process of flirting is generally short lived. Just like heat and temperature are for an ice cream; over exposure, attachment, intelligence and emotions are for flirting.

Why blurt & flirt: Life is not about the number of breaths we take, but it’s about the moments that take our breath away. It’s about pursuing happyness. It’s not about burdening oneself with the diktats of society, creating boundaries and perceiving everything in black and white. It’s about creating a canvass and filling it up with a myriad of colors, and letting one’s consciousness free and experience the wide spectrum of life and people. It’s not about doing everything in life with an aim or target in mind. It is sometimes just about doing something, to surprise oneself. It’s not about being afraid of rejection, it’s about taking chances. Just because one might make a fool out of oneself should not prevent one from not having tried and lived at all.

So, the next time when I hear the song in the background, ‘Jab bhi koi ladki dekhun’, I intend to sing along, ‘Mera dil deewana bole - flirt karle, karle, karle, flirt karle’. Maybe, it could be music to someone’s ears.

Of Crushes, getting crushed & asking out

The other day I was talking to one of my closest friends. Every now and again he would come and tell me that he’s madly in love with some damsel and then after a few weeks the name would have changed. It made me wonder about the ephemeral span of his relationships especially when it took me more than a year of hardship to get over. In fact it did make me realize the reverse of 'if you run after something, it further runs away from you' -that when you try to run away from something it stalks you.

Upon questioning him about his Oshoic behaviour (clarifying that I had discounted the hormones), he said – “I love the feeling when I ask a girl out – the possibility of a yes or a no". Of course all the honesty evaporated when he said that the latter had never happened.

The same day dad asked me if I liked the girl who we had gone to see for my cousin. I felt it would be unfair on my part to judge a person based on a 5 minute chit-chat amidst the prying eyes of the relatives and said that it should be left to the discretion of the groom to be. Anyhow, the next arrow fired kind of took me off-guard - ‘What kind of a girl do you like?’. I thought for a moment, and replied – ‘Someone who I could talk to for an hour and still keep on talking’. Understanding that there was a whole quiver in store, I ran away.

After a quarter century of lifetime, I have come across many people – more males than females, courtesy the all boys school till class 12 and then IIT. Being the non-shy types or may be for being a Virgoan - I have always been able to mix freely with girls and had my share of crushes & infatuations. From making birthday cards, to writing poems and waiting at the bus stand at 7 a.m. missing school to get her glimpse, to talking over the phone for hours and a few more - all got nipped in the bud. Then finally when something lasted longer than the lifespan of a butterfly, it was harshly proved that in Matrix of reality, the one you who you imagine to be the one, does not necessarily turn out to be so.

Society at large favors the temperate over the mercurial, timid over the revolutionary. I do feel that there is some sense of rationality about certain norms or else there would be complete anarchy. But considering our super hypocritical Indian society where there is very little room for individuality and any sort of deviant behavior is quickly branded as an aberration – one needs to take charge in certain cases.

Sometimes when I think of the happiest and most cherished memories of my life, they have something in common – of being uncontrolled and uninhibited. Those that rise from within, where there’s the element of anticipation, surprise, excitement and adrenaline rush.

Our preferences and choices are shaped by our lifestyle, ego, education, society and a multitude of other factors. To find someone who would match up to your ideal list and for things to be happily ever after is nothing but a transition from the Newtonian deterministic world to the Quantum Probabilistic world, where the outcome is simply based on chance - a gamble of sorts.

In such a case, I would any day prefer to roll the dice on my own (as many times as possible) till the right numbers show up rather than someone else (arbitrary pundit in most cases) doing the same. There would at least be something to cherish (even the finger prints on the cheek) and more importantly the satisfaction of being solely responsible for the outcome.

So, here I am – 25, Male & Single asking all those females who endorse my views mentioned above – “What’s your Rashee?”

P.S. Inputs w.r.t to better starters would be highly appreciated :P

Entrepreneurship - From Amorphous to Crystalline

Over the last two years of being a full-time entrepreneur, I have come across an overwhelming number of people, places, ideas and emotions. With so much information, one needs to clear the clutter and make things simple. Just like light falling on a surface, I have divided my experiences into three categories: reflected rays (those which got rejected), absorbed (those that made sense and had an impact) while others that got transmitted (were too complex to comprehend).

To shine like a diamond, one needs to focus on the rays that one absorbs and reflect them internally. Some of the most significant things that I can remember being told and relate to are:

Mrs. J. Solomon (ex-Principal, South Point High School) – ‘Give value to the society & the society will give you 100 times in return’ –> Honesty & Integrity

Prof. H.S. Ray (IIT Khararpur professor) – ‘Always think big as it takes nearly the same effort to do something small’ -> Vision

Mr. H.K. Chaudhary (Visionary Entrepreneur & Director of Vikram Group) – ‘My servant is a nice person. If I gave him Rs. 5 lacs, he’d not know what to do with it and return the same next day. You cannot run a business with nicety and warmth. -> Professionalism & Discipline

Mr. Anindya Dutta (IIT Kharagpur senior, friend & mentor) - ‘Do something so well, that it becomes your signature. Once people recognize your signature, you can sign anything and it’ll become gold’. –>Focus

Mr. Pradip Agarwal (Dad) – ‘Whatever you’ll do, you’ll do well’ –> Confidence

With the above five qualities being imperative to success in anything in life, an entrepreneur needs to be confused, inquisitive and constantly learn and derive inspiration from the surroundings. An entrepreneur needs to shuffle from being a dreamer to a pragmatist, a dictator to a liberal and a myriad of contradictions & complex roles. It is therefore important to be like a Swan - Calm on the surface, but vigorously always paddle underneath.

What can be intrinsic to an individual may be latent or absent in others – after all we are all wired in a different manner. The basic principles that may work for an individual, do not necessarily work for a group. The challenge therefore lies in creating an ecosystem that would manage diversity and make sure that the whole is greater than the sum of its parts. For this to happen, there needs to be utmost clarity with respect to the vision, targets, leadership, talents, responsibilities, accountability and incentives.

The most successful societies, organizations and teams have been those that have been able to create a system that gets people to work at the edge of their comfort zone.

Be it a poet, an artist or an entrepreneur, he needs time to reflect in peace and give shape and direction to the turbulences created by the zeal to create and innovate. For the last 6 months or so, I have been trying to encapsulate the gamut of ideas that like entropy keeps on increasing. Perhaps it would be another unsuccessful attempt tonight, but who cares.

Structuring - the quest from amorphous to crystalline continues.